Envisioning 2016

I find that my best days are the days I don't spend a ton of time at home by myself. My apartment still doesn't feel like home to me, it's still very barren and lacking in furniture, and it's just...foreign. I honestly feel more at home in hotel rooms. I'm really not sure why that is. But regardless, I do best when I'm not home alone for hours on end. Today was one of those days.

I'm teaching one class in African American history online through SEMO this semester, and that starts Tuesday. I had tons of work to do to get the class up and running, so I went to Starbucks to work on it. I used to do that because I had crappy internet at home, for years, while living in Cape. This time, I went, because I knew it wouldn't be good for me to stay home and work for hours. I got everything done that I needed to, and headed to Boulder.

Every month, my cousin, Valerie, will be hosting a creative evening for a few friends, at her home in Boulder. Though it'll usually be on Wednesdays,  our first meeting was today.  We were instructed to bring posterboard, and materials for making a 2016 vision board. If I'm going to make something, I'm going to make sure it's pretty. So I got a black poster, some awesome letters and scrapbook paper, brought along some other materials I already had, and set to work when I got there. Everyone else had pictures, as well as words for theirs, but I tend to take things in better if I just have significant words highlighted. As "let it go" is my phrase for this year, I used ginormous die cut letters to make that the central focus of my board. Then, I took some blank index cards, and started artistically writing out phrases and words I want to focus on and be true for the year. I'm such a perfectionist, it took me two hours to glue "let it go" to the board, and write on three index cards: "marketing success," "love," and "freedom." Of course, I have far more to add to the board. Some things, purely conceptual, others, specific, such as visiting Four Corners, losing the last 15lbs I didn't lose from all the trauma, another Whole 30, and more. 

It was so nice to sit and talk to some other women for a while, and be creative with them. I really look forward to our monthly meetings and creativity this year. Sitting down and mindfully envisioning what I want for this year was also incredibly helpful. As I keep my vision clear, as I focus on finding and accomplishing various things this year, I expect that life will continue to improve. Clearly, I'm leaps and bounds ahead of where I was a month ago. I'm on the right path. But I think of the famous lines written by Robert Frost:
                             "...but I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep..."
I do have promises to keep. Promises to myself. Promises to keep improving. To make it through. To emerge better and stronger. And I have a hell of a long way to go before I get there. But I'm well on my way. The surviving part is over. It's time to start working on the thriving part.