Friday, July 8, 2016

Asking for Help

Tuesday, I went to see a new hand specialist, to have my carpal tunnel and thumb issues looked at. The doctor I saw is the one who does hands and elbows for the Rockies and Broncos. She evaluated my hand, and said that she would like to get the results from the nerve conduction test I had done in Cape last year. She said that if it shows any nerve damage, which I'm pretty sure it does, her preference would be to do surgery. I signed papers for my old doctor to send out the report from the test, and she said that the office would call and schedule a new appointment when they got the results. I was expecting to hear that, but I was disappointed when I left. I'm 32 years old, and in all probability, looking at my 7th orthopedic surgery, for no other reason than that my joints weren't made to last.

It's frustrating that I can't really play the piano anymore. I wound up in tears on Sunday, while kneading a pie crust. Getting dressed can even be painful. A surgery would help, but it would be yet again months without the use of my hand- this time my dominant hand- and more months of therapy. This would be my 7th orthopedic surgery in 13 years, and not because I'm hard on my joints, but just because...they give out too soon.

I don't really have a choice but to deal with this. It'll only get worse if I ignore it. Normally, I handle my health issues really well. But it gets really overwhelming, especially on top of all my other issues. Sometimes, I find myself throwing items on the floor and storming away, because I can't open a lid, or hold something, or do whatever I need to do with my hands. It frustrates me that I love doing so many things with my hands, and so many strenuous physical activites, but I'm so severely limited by my health issues.

I don't know that I have any big point to make with this post, or any great story to tell. I guess my only point is this: sometimes the most Dauntless thing to do is to be able to accept and confront one's limitations, and to ask for help when needed. And that's something I have learned to do a lot. So I guess that makes me brave. 

No comments:

Post a Comment